Anyone who has been married for any length of time can relate to the moments you felt the need to seek advice. You can be newly engaged or married for 50 years and still desire to talk to someone about how you feel. Your relationship with your partner is the most intimate relationship you will ever experience, and somehow, it can be the most lonely. How can this happen when you diligently followed the yellow brick road, expectations of society, and made lifelong decisions to be together? All committed relationships drive over bumps in the road and experience times of hardships and life experiences. When life happens it allows you to self-reflect. Self-reflections can seem like puddles, pools, or lakes in your internal thoughts. These thoughts will eventually manifest in your relationship and give you a sense of feast or famine. Self-reflection, however, can bring positive change. The goal here is to find the best places to seek this advice.
The first place we seek comfort seems to be from those closest to us, our friends and family. Talking to someone who brings you comfort is a natural place to find refuge. These superhumans know you, love you, and usually see what you see. However, sometimes because these people know you, see you up close and personal, they are biased in their advice. These superhumans in no way want to crush your relationship. If you are honest with yourself, then we can see this close group of people sometimes can be too familiar to give constructive advice.
It is not easy opening up to someone you do not know if you have never tried. Those that have tried talking to someone outside of their friends and family quickly feel the difference. They no longer prefer to open up to close family and friends after experiencing someone they will not be seated next to at the next social event. So how do you choose? How do you know which is the best source of help? Let this be your guide in making that decision.
Couples seeking formal relationship advice have many resources to choose from: support groups, hotlines, therapists, psychologists, counselors, and coaches. All of which brings much-needed diversity in the scope of a couple’s relationship needs. As you continue to evaluate your circumstances, maybe one of those mentioned resources gives you a sense of relief, makes you uncomfortable, or brings you unwanted anxiety. Sometimes we have a sense of telling ourselves, I am not bad enough to need help. I think we all tell ourselves that until we can not endure a situation anymore. Let us take a look at the most common source of relationship/marriage guidance, counseling.
A marriage counselor is often referred to as a therapist as well. The broad scope of marriage counseling is defined as a type of psychotherapy, couples therapy, or licensed therapist. Marriage counseling is generally provided by licensed therapists known as marriage and family therapists. These therapists provide the same mental health services as other therapists, but with a specific focus — a couple's relationship. These professionals have the credentials to facilitate discussions regarding post-traumatic situations and recovery from destructive behaviors. Sometimes circumstances of substance abuse, physical or mental conditions, mental and physical abuse can greatly devastate relationships. Seeking help and guidance from this source of professionals is essential.
A healthy and grounded couple will seek out a coach. A relationship, engagement, or marriage coach will also meet with you weekly, together, separately, and dive into the fine points of the relationship woes you are experiencing. A coach’s focus is to help you reach the desired outcomes of your relationship. Together you develop action plans to achieve the desired results. You will also receive resources, tools, and a bag full of tips and tricks to use during conflict. Your coaching sessions and engagement period look toward the future, work toward goals, and implement good communication skills. Balance and blissfulness are achievable in a relationship and engagement. A relationship, engagement, and marriage coach will motivate and inspire you to be better.
If you are newly engaged and looking to strengthen your relationship then an engagement coach is a perfect choice. Not only will an engagement coach help you with everything already mentioned, but they are well versed in everything surrounding your wedding. The focus during engagement is to make sure you are prepared and walking toward a successful path to marriage. You may also be wondering how to manage wedding planning and your new future. The engagement season moves quickly, and before you know, you will be walking down the aisle to say I do. We encourage you to take the time now to focus on the whole reason you are engaged in the first place. Hone in on your partner, your future, who you are today as individuals, and who you want to become together. Spend this precious time, before the wedding, concentrated on what matters, your love, together, forever.
The goal in every relationship is not to survive but to thrive.
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